Moms sometimes don’t get the credit they deserve for being damn good moms.
I’m not saying we should get extra recognition for doing the things we are suppose to do for our children, but often moms are going over and beyond to be amazing and those efforts sometimes go unnoticed.
No matter how you came to be a mom, you quickly realized, being a mom can be intimidating, hard work and sacrifice.
Motherhood is intimidating
The high expectations put on mothers is intimidating. Leaving the hospital with my daughter was one of the best moments in my life, but it was also scary. I was responsible for a beautiful new life. My daughter was completely depending on me and my husband, to keep her alive and well.
There are great resources for moms; however, there is no one-size-fits-all mommy manual. So, how do we know if we are doing it right? Here is the super secret answer…
There is no right!
We wake up each day and put the needs of our children first. We give love, care, and attention. We try to be available and present and give our all to being super kick ass moms, every single day. It’s not easy, it’s actually a lot of hard work!
It’s harder than that too!
Motherhood is hard work
Children are great but they require a lot of hard work. They are impatient, self-fish, and sometimes loud baby bosses that want all of our attention. Have you been there? Are you still there?
Children are impatient
Children want everything right now, especially your time and their food.
Did your time become more precious after having children? I bet it did.
I used to have so much free time to read, take long baths or showers, and eat out at restaurants. I could leave work and sit at a coffee shop, if I wanted, I was in control of my own time. Now, my child is in full control of how I spend a large majority of my time. I had to reorganize my life and re-learn the basics of time management, if you need some help with this too, start here. Yes, the smallest person in our home has the most control and she is demanding of my time and her food.
At the hospital, I was feeding baby every 2-3 hours; a nurse would disrupt me every time I was getting into that good, deep, REM sleep, to tell me to nurse baby. #Damngoodannoyingnurses
Once we got home, there was no nurse to interrupt my sleep, my baby figured she’d take over. She let me know she was hungry with impatient cries; I’d never get a polite may I have some food please. This impatience was understandable but because I wasn’t producing enough breast milk it was difficult, read more about my struggle here. I wanted to breast feed exclusively, I felt it was my duty and when we started supplementing, I felt a bit like a failure, initially. If you breastfed or are currently breastfeeding, you may know the struggle. Breastfeeding isn’t the only struggle; sleeping is another struggle because babies are selfish. #Imisssleep
Children are self-fish
Until a certain age, children are rightfully self-fish. Our world is about making sure they have all their needs met, no matter what time it is. Prior to baby, I was sleeping eight or more hours a night. I could cry just thinking about those glorious nights. Since pregnancy and the baby, five hours seems to be the average, which means some nights, I get no sleep. If I was a baby, I wouldn’t be self-fish, I’d let my parents sleep longer, especially if it was the weekend. Do our babies give us this courtesy? NO! We sacrifice our time and our sleep for our bundles of joy; we make these sacrifices because we are damn good moms who love our children. Many of us make even bigger sacrifices.
Damn Good Moms Sacrifice for their children
Many moms sacrifice a lot for their children and some would sacrifice even more. When I was in my third trimester, a common question I got was about my intent to return to work; this is a normal because many women sacrifice their careers after giving birth.
After giving birth, women leave work to become full-time parents. No matter what your occupation was prior to giving birth, the decision to leave the workplace can be difficult. The decision comes with many uncertainties:
- How long will I stay out of work?
- Will I find another job when I am ready to return to work?
- Can we thrive on one income?
- What happens if the one and only money-maker loses employment?
- Will I be happy being a stay-at-home-mom?
- What about my social life?
Choosing to sacrifice our careers is a big decision that some women make. They become damn good stay-at-home-moms.
Leaving work isn’t an option for every mom and working moms make sacrifices in other ways:
- Working moms shift their schedule.
- Work hard for the man with limited sleep.
- Many attach plastic vacuum cups to their breasts so that they can pump at work to continue breastfeeding at home.
- They are away from their children for several hours a day, so that they can be kick ass providers.
It’s difficult because they leave work to come home to another job that never ends, motherhood. They are damn good working moms!
Damn good moms
No matter your circumstance or the age of your child, if you are working hard to do all you can to provide love and light to your child, with all the resources that you have, you may just be a damn good mom and you should be super proud.
Recognition from your loved ones and peers is great but there is nothing wrong with patting your own back and acknowledging you are a damn good mom for yourself!
Shout outs to birth moms, moms who adopted, sister-moms, all moms!
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